Treasures of Friendship and Family

Finding what matters most in life can be something we search for over years when often it is right in front of us. I was privileged enough to spend time with my uncle when he was in hospital in the last few months of his life and got to listen to conversations with people reflecting on their 80 odd years.

What they valued most seemed to be the most simple things - the acts of kindness and love from friends and family. None of them placed much value on the size of their houses or the fanciness of their cars. What mattered most was the time spent with others, the small acts of love like hand picked flowers from the grandchild - hugs and silly stories from the grandchild, the companionship and love of an animal, the sharing of doing things together, holidays and adventures over the years - again, time spent together, the recognition of personal interests like collecting frogs.

All of it was about the little things in life that bring joy and happiness. It was all very simple.

Spending time with these people who knew they were living the last weeks of their lives was an amazing experience and life enriching gift for a 30-something. We are told so often it is the small things that matter in life but for me it wasn't until I was listening to what these real people were saying that I got the message.

I now see frogs and think of the value of doing little things all because of one treasure of an intelligent and talented lady called June who loved to collect frogs and who was amazingly open about her very personal life lessons.

Since then I've practiced more the lessons I learnt - I've been kinder to friends, family and strangers. I smile more at others and am rewarded with returning smiles more often. I reward good marks at school with indulges like a late school holidays breakfast in bed followed with acknowledgment of the good school report. I try to be kinder to myself with my own internal language - a constant effort but I think that's so for most of us. For each of us it is about the little things in our lives.

Seeking fulfillment of the simpler things in life rather than going after the consumeristic possessions gave much more enjoyment and joy was the key lesson being offered as their parting gift by these generous people.

5 Lessons Taught By Elders

Here are 5 very realistic and practical lessons offered by treasured 80+ year olds:

1. The kindness and love from friends and family is far more valuable than most of us realise. The sooner we figure this out the better life is.

2. Having lots of money doesn't mean life is better. Having enough money does make life easier.

3. Regrets are more often based around what we didn't do that what we did do.

4. Learning how to forgive ourselves and others makes life better and happier.

5. Tell your friends and family you love them and what you think is wonderful about them.