Being the Highest Version of Yourself

Finding peace with Stephen Chong

* This is a story from the grand master who was speaking to a crowd of villagers. An excerpt from “Stories that change the world”.

‘Master, will you speak with us about sex?’ asked a young teenager amongst the crowd.
You speak of the gentleness of a lamb or the rabid power of the wolf. You ask of that which makes you soar to the heavens, or be mired in mud.

Sex is both a joyous liberation for the self, or a bind that chains you to a rock. It can blind your sight to the obvious and the unenviable, or it can exalt you in the eyes of the other.

I say to you that sex is a gift of life. Yet, it should not become your master. Enjoy! Exalt! Fulfill yourself! Sex is a nectar of the Gods, yet do not allow yourself to become enslaved.

There is no guilt in the pursuit of pleasure, only the realisation of wasted time. Do what you do with virtue, not with shame. May your heart be filled with joy, not with guilt. Let your thoughts be filled with love, not with lust. Allow your heart to be replete with sharing and mutual joy, not with power, domination or control.

When finally you stand upon the precipice of death, will your soul exalt in your pursuit of that which did not serve you well - power, lust, avarice and self-interest? Will your soul rue your thoughts of guilt, shame and remorse? I say to you sincerely, glory in the life and pleasures that have been bestowed upon you by the Almighty. Yet know that these are tools of love. Love for the other, as for the self. Do unto others only that which you would have them do unto you.

When you have sex, do it with love – not out of lust or need.  Exalt in your feelings of ecstasy, but realise that its fleeting embrace is but a droplet to the ocean of God’s love for you.

Sex is a natural and normal function of human expression. It is a pathway that leads to love’s front door. It is not wrong, shameful, disgusting or something tacitly improper. As children you should explore your feelings, urges and curiosities in a wholesome way free from attachment to guilt or shame. These feelings are a pathway to an ever-expanding experience of yourself.  Yet, do not be held fast by thoughts that “this is it” or “this is what life is all about”. If you do, you will become stuck in a mire of quicksand that will soon cover your heart.

Seek always the higher good – for yourself and for others. This way, all of your experiences of sex will be a liberation for yourself and for others. Enjoy everything that sex has to offer, but do not desire it. You do not need it.

 Know that purity, sanctity and Godliness are not expressions of those that have abstained from sex. Having sex is not a sin. Nothing could be further from the truth. These are merely life choices caused by misguided notions that sex is dirty and unclean. It is not! It is wholesome, beautiful and wonderful, if experienced in love’s fullest expression.

Glory in who you are, do not repress your strong feelings and desires. These feelings repressed are cause for unwanted anxiety and self-loathing. For those that you cherish and love, express your feelings through a gentle touch, a loving embrace or a gentle kiss.

Express who you are - not what others say that you should be. Be who you are, yet seek always to become the highest version of yourself. Do not repress feelings of guilt or shame for these will stop you from realising the fullness of who you really are.’
At this same moment, the young person who had posed the question to the master began to cry. These were great sobs of lamentation that emanated from the young teenager. The master was overcome by great compassion for the grief they expressed and immediately beckoned the boy to his side.

‘Come sit beside me here and let me tell you a story to soothe your wounded spirit,’ said the master.

‘This is the story of a young boy who was cast aside by his family. They were very poor and could not properly feed their many children. So it was that they sent this young boy to an orphanage.

This orphanage was run by a group of brethren monks who lived a life of austerity and celibacy in accord with their beliefs about God and the pathway to heaven’s door.

Life in the orphanage was very strict and the penalties for bad behaviour and non-compliance were harsh indeed. It was often that the young man was summarily beaten by the monks for what were but minor infractions of the orphanages’ code of conduct.
One day, after many months of austere living and life challenges, the young man was taken by one of the brethren and was forced to perform some horrid acts that caused the boy to experience much pain and suffering, both physically and mentally.

‘Why have they done this to me?’ cried the boy, as he lay alone in his bed. ‘They are supposed to be “men of God”, yet they commit such heinous acts against the young and innocent. They use their power and domination to exert their distorted will against the vulnerable. ‘Why me?’ ‘Why did I deserve this?’ continued the lamentations of the young man.’

Slowly then, as he spoke, the master raised himself from his seat and stood fully in front of the large crowd that had assembled to hear his words. He then turned his back to the gaping crowd. He then removed his cloak and lowered his chemise from his shoulders. This made those in the crowd gasp in horror at what they saw.

Criss-crossed across the master’s back were the scars from many lash marks that the master had received when he was a young man. So many scars in fact that they were too numerous to count. It was evident to all of the assembled that he was telling his own story. This was the story of his youth.

Many in the crowd cried out in horror. Some of the women wailed and shed tears of grief and compassion. ‘This is the master’ they thought, ‘How could such deprivations happen to this ‘man of God’?’ they lamented.

The master then realigned his clothing and resumed his seat facing the astonished crowd of villagers.

Win online prize packs‘My children,’ said the master, ‘many of us have endured suffering and pain beyond the bounds of anything considered normal within our civilized society.  Yet it is certain that the oppressors and perpetrators of these heinous crimes will themselves feel the pain they have inflicted upon others when they move beyond the veil you call ‘death’. In the realm of the absolute, where we experience oneness with God, the divine laws will become clear to their eyes.

“We are all one” is a divine law of the universe. Therefore, what you cause to effect in another, you ultimately experience yourself. This is espoused in the law, “What you sow, so shall you reap.”  Those that have caused others pain and suffering will ultimately experience their oneness with others.’

‘My sons and daughters, I say to you also that these experiences, though harsh and dolorous should not be seen as chains that bind you to a tortured past. Rather, let them be as a stairwell that helps you ascend to the heights of wisdom and grace. Let these experiences be a journey of enlightenment, rather than a prison cell.

Rise above, I say to you. Your body may have been violated and broken, but they cannot enslave the love in your heart. They cannot stop you from shining the beauty of your light for all others to see and experience. Seek always to become the highest version of the grandest vision of who you are. You are no lesser than a child of God to rise above the actions of lesser men.
Seek solace in the silence of a quiet mind and a thankful heart. This is your pathway to enlightenment.’

After these words the master then took the young man’s head in his hands and peered deeply into his eyes, reaching into his very soul.

‘My son,’ he whispered, ‘go forth now and do good works for the benefit of others, so that none need experience the pain and suffering that has been your lot to experience. Shout your passion from the rafters and the rooftops so that all may hear your sage wisdom.  Let your experiences be as a beacon to ensure that others do not have to tread the same pathway that you have had to endure. Go with God’s grace, my son.’



Finding out more about Stephen Chong

Finding out more about Stephen Chong

Stephen Chong of The Music of the Soul
Stephen Chong is a professional development coach and author of the new book The Music of the Soul: A pathway to a rich and fulfilling life, now available at good book stores or online at
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